History of Autumn

f you ever watch movie titled (500) Days of Summer, you will understand why I call him Mr. Autumn. I call him that way for two reasons. 

First, our first hello story. It is like the last scene of the movie. Tom Hansen meets a girl named Autumn, when he’s interviewed for a job in an office. Autumn is his competitor, but the ending implies that they are going to go out for coffee. Mr. Autumn and me are like them. We meet for the first time in a job interview, where he is my competitor. After my interview session finished, surprisingly Mr. Autumn is there. He offers me a cup of coffee.

“I don’t know what your favorite coffee is, so I assume it’s Flat White”

I smiled. I don’t drink coffee anymore. I used to. Until my doctor suggested me to avoid coffee, since I couldn’t handle stomachache. Whenever I sit in a coffee shop, tea is always my favorite beverage to order.

“Sorry, I don’t drink coffee”

He doesn’t insist. He gives it to the office boy who just walked to us.

“How was your interview? I think mine was good. Very good”, Mr. Autumn asks.

“ I think it was great. I’m sure I will be the chosen one for this job”.

He laughs.

“I’m sure I will beat you this time”, he says.

The conversation goes on for the next twenty minutes, while we walk to the gate. Finally he promises to treat me a cup of matcha latte -after I mentioned that I prefer tea than coffee- if I get this job. Getting this job means defeating him. I know I can make it. Not for a cup of  free matcha latte from Mr. Autumn, but for the sake of my future career.

Another reason why I call him Mr. Autumn is because two weeks before the interview I broke up with my boyfriend. We had been together for two years before decided to go in separate ways. There was no drama, but it’s still hurt. Just like how Tom Hansen meets Autumn after passed broken heart moment with Summer, I do the same with Mr. Autumn. When my ex is called Mr. Summer, the guy I met during interview must be called Mr. Autumn.

Tom Hansen suddenly moves on the day he meets Autumn. So do I. Although in my case it is not love at first sight, it turns to be love. However, I’ve moved on from Mr. Summer now. Perhaps I haven’t fallen in love with Mr. Autumn. But when he talks briefly about his dream to explore the world, I realize that my life doesn’t end by the time I broke up with Mr. Summer.

We are all allowed to feel sad, feel the broken heart. We are allowed to cry too when our relationship is over. But this moment shouldn’t go for a long time. The world offers us a lot of opportunities. The opportunity to meet a better man, and the opportunity to achieve our dream. This is exactly what I’m doing now.

First Hello

Nervous. One word to explain how I feel. I’ve sat in the waiting room for… well, almost two hours. It sucks. Waiting means boring. But I have to deal with it. For the sake of my future. I have not had permanent job for one and half years. It’s worse than waiting here. I need this job very much. I can’t ask money from Mom and Dad anymore, although I know they would be glad to give me as much as I want. Under one condition: I must work in Dad’s company. It’s a big no. Dad owns a law firm. I was a student of law faculty. You must think that it doesn’t matter to work there. Well, it’s a big deal for me. The clients there are from big companies in this country. Yes, it handles corporate legal aspects. This is not my passion. I want to be a lawyer in different field. I dream to be a human right lawyer or an environmental lawyer.

However, it takes a long time to get the my dream job. Most of human right or environmental law firms want experienced staff to work there. Besides being an intern in Dad’s law firm, I never work anywhere else.

Another reason why I don’t wanna work in Dad’s office is because it would be the weapon for Mom to set me up with one of Dad’s employee. I use to call him Mr. Suit. He wear ssuit every day! Once in a while, all employees there are required to suit up, when they meet their clients. But wearing a suit during company gathering event is a big no. I prefer a guy who is more casual. Oh, and he’s stiff and arrogant (as he’s the youngest associate in Dad’s company) too. These are the reason why cross him out from my guys-to-date list is a must.

By the way, I am a 26 years old woman who lives alone in Jakarta-although my parents live in the same city. I live in a studio apartment, in the suburb while my parents live in the city centre. I visit them in the weekend-when I have no agenda with friends. So far, I can afford my apartment with my part-time online job as a translator, while I keep seeking a good permanent job. The payment is not really high, but the main reason is because I want to achieve my dream. To work as a human right or environmental lawyer.

Eventually, after hundreds of working application, I am invited for this interview. The office is not a law firm. It is a non-government organization works to assist various human right cases in Indonesia. They need some legal experts there and I am one of the candidates, along with about twenty other people. Most of them have been interviewed so far and only one left with me in the waiting room. A guy. He looks like a mess. Almost late for the interview this afternoon and he lets his hair spiky. It’s not weird when you are not a lawyer-or at least a lawyer candidate. All male lawyers I’ve ever met have sleek or luxuriant hair. They use wax to do their hair. This guy is different. He lets his hair natural for this interview.

“It looks like we’re the last persons to be interviewed today”.

He starts our conversation. I just smile and look back into my iPad-to check on the latest celebrity gossips. I don’t really like talking to the stranger-especially with my competitors and has messy hair. He then mentions his name and asks for mine. I only give a short answer, wish he would stop asking. But he doesn’t. He offers me two chocolate bar taken from his backpack-one dark and one milk. Yes, he bring backpacks instead of suitcase like other candidates! Maybe he comes from other planet. Planet of Weirdo. 

“Don’t worry, this chocolate is not poisoned. Otherwise, it would help you being more relaxed and calm. I’ll prove it” he opens the wrap and eat the chocolate. The milky one. Hand the dark chocolate to me.

“No, thanks”

“Don’t worry, it won’t make you fat. Even when you are, you will still look pretty” I don’t answer his statement. Keep looking into my iPad. This time I opens a gossip forum on the Internet.

“Well, I just think that you’re too nervous. So I offered you this chocolate”, I think he feels scared with my reaction. Sigh, I look at him and finally accept dark chocolate. He smiles. Actually he doesn’t look bad. He has dimple in his right cheek. Although he doesn’t have corporate look, he still looks good.

Then he mentions his name and asks for mine. The name turns out to be the name I always remember after that day. I just don’t know about it, just like I have no idea that I would call him Mr. Autumn.

Notes From The Sky

In a few minutes, we will be arrived in Jakarta

The flight attendant just broadcasted the usual announcement. It means I will breathe the polluted air in Jakarta again after one year. The same air you breathe. I am happy to see my family and friends again, expecting they have waited for me in the airport lounge. Hugging them will be the first thing to do, once I see them.

However, there is a small part of my heart that still wants you to be there too. I didn't say goodbye before escaped to other country. But you didn't come either. You didn't take me to the airport, give me one last hug, and let me go to the school I had dreamed about. Instead, I heard you were spending time with another girl by the time I left this country.

Jakarta... A lot of things had done there. Thank God, you were there. You were ready whenever I couldn't handle the fact that everyone was screaming out loud in this city. Patiently listened to my story about how a man in the bus pretended to sleep while a pregnant woman needed his seat. You promised to always be by my side. As you told me, I could come to you whenever I want. It was amazing that I had trusted you from the moment we met.

Unfortunately, everything had to fall in the end. I guessed the reason was because I fell for you. Falling for my best friend is the biggest mistake I've ever made. Especially when it is unrequited love. Today I feel grateful. This unfortunate event became a trigger to achieve my another dream, pursuing higher education abroad.

For one year, I have done very good. Meeting new friends, travelling to the amazing places, improving my analytical skills. I thought it would be okay when I return to Jakarta. But now I know it's not. The in-flight announcement just made me wonder what will happen when we finally see each other again after one year...